759 Anna Kareninahusbands shamefaced embarrassment, his repeatedawkward efforts to approach the subject, and how at last,having thought of the one means of helping Dolly withoutwounding her pride, he had suggested to Kitty—what hadnot occurred to her before—that she should give up hershare of the property.He an unbeliever indeed! With his heart, his dread ofoffending anyone, even a child! Everything for others,nothing for himself. Sergey Ivanovitch simply considers itas Kostyas duty to be his steward. And its the same withhis sister. Now Dolly and her children are under hisguardianship; all these peasants who come to him everyday, as though he were bound to be at their service.Yes, only be like your father, only like him, she said,handing Mitya over to the nurse, and putting her lips tohis cheek.1691 of 1759 Anna KareninaChapter 8Ever since, by his beloved brothers deathbed, Levinhad first glanced into the questions of life and death in thelight of these new convictions, as he called them, whichhad during the period from his twentieth to his thirtyfourth year imperceptibly replaced his childish andyouthful beliefs—he had been stricken with horror, not somuch of death, as of life, without any knowledge ofwhence, and why, and how, and what it was. The physicalor porn free ganization, its decay, the indestructibility of matter, thelaw of the conservation of energy, evolution, were thewords which usurped the place of his old belief. Thesewords and the ideas associated with them were very wellfor intellectual purposes. But for life they yielded nothing,and Levin felt suddenly like a man who has changed hiswarm fur cloak for a muslin garment, and going for thefirst time into the frost is immediately convinced, not byreason, but by his whole nature that he is as good asnaked, and that he must infallibly perish miserably.From that moment, though he did not distinctly face it,and still went on living as before, Levin had never lost thissense of terror at his lack of knowledge.1692 of 1759 Anna KareninaHe vag porn free uely felt, too, that what he called his newconvictions were not merely lack of knowledge, but thatthey were part of a whole order of ideas, in which noknowledge of what he needed was possible.At first, marriage, with the new joys and duties boundup with it, had completely crowded out these thoughts.But of late, while he was staying in Moscow after hiswifes confinement, with nothing to do, the question thatclamored for solution had more and more often, more andmore insistently, haunted Levins mind.The question was summed up for him thus: If I do notaccept the answers Christianity gives to the problems ofmy life, what answers do I accept? And in the wholearsenal of his convictions, so far from finding anysatisfactory answers, he was utterly unable to find anythingat all like an answer.He was in the position of a man seeking food in toyshops and tool shops.Istinctively, unconsciously, with every book, withevery conversation, with every man he met, he was on thelookout for light on these questions and their solution.What puzzled and distracted him above everything wasthat the majority of men of his age and circle had, likehim, exchanged their old beliefs for the same new1693 of 1759 Anna Kareninaconvictio porn free ns, and yet saw nothing to lament in this, andwere perfectly satisfied and serene. So that, apart from theprincipal question, Levin was tortured by other questionstoo. Were these people sincere? he asked himself, or werethey playing a part? or was it that they understood theanswers science gave to these problems in some different,clearer sense than he did? And he assiduously studied boththese mens opinions and the books which treated of thesescientific explanations.One fact he had found out since these questions hadengrossed his mind, was that he had been quite wrong insupposing from the recollections of the circle of his youngdays at college, that religion had outlived its day, and thatit was now practically non-existent. All the people nearestto him who were good in their lives were believers. Theold prince, and Lvov, whom he liked so much, and SergeyIvanovitch, and all the women believed, and his wifebelieved as simply as he had believed in his earliestchildhood, and ninety-nine hundredths of the Russianpeople, all the working people for whose life he felt thedeepest respect, believed.Another fact of which he became convinced, afterreading many scientific books, was that the men whoshared his views had no other construction to put on1694 of 1759 Anna Kareninathem, and that they gave no explanation of the questionswhich he felt he could not live without answering, butsimply ignored their existence and attempted to explainother questions of no possible interest to him, such as theevolution of organisms, the materialistic theory ofconsciousness, and so forth.Moreover, during his wifes confinement, somethinghad happened that seemed extraordinary to him. He, anunbeliever, had fallen into praying, and at the moment heprayed, he believed. But that moment had porn free passed, and hecould not make his state of mind at that moment fit intothe rest of his life.He could not admit that at that moment he knew thetruth, and that now he was wrong; for as soon as he beganthinking calmly about it, it all fell to pieces. He could notadmit that he was mistaken then, for his spiritual conditionthen was precious to him, and to admit that it was a proofof weakness would have been to desecrate those moments.He was miserably divided against himself, and strained allhis spiritual forces to the utmost to escape from thiscondition.1695 of 1759 Anna KareninaChapter 9These doubts fretted and harassed him, growing weakeror stronger from time to time, but never leaving him. Heread and thought, and the more he read and the more hethought, the further he felt from the aim he was pursuing.Of late in Moscow and in the country, since he hadbecome convinced that he would find no solution in thematerialists, he had read and reread thoroughly Plato,Spinoza, Kant, Schelling, Hegel, and Schopenhau porn free er, thephilosophers who gave a non-materialistic ex porn free planation oflife.Their ideas seemed to him fruitful when he was readingor was himself seeking arguments to refute other theories,especially those of the materialists; but as soon as he beganto read or sought fat himself a solution of problems, thesame thing always happened. As long as he followed thefixed definition of obscure words such as