| | rublz
 | Sliding gracefully through a flirty conversation, slap! comes a cliché of a question: “Who am I?” Pushing aside every obvious rebuttal that this mundane inquiry rightfully deserves, I pondered upon a thought that there probably is a worthy answer to this loathsome question.
Self-description is always a little complicated, most definitely biased (because of what the law calls “vested interest”), and is subject to change without prior notice. Just like one of those tricky job-interview questions that ask you to describe your weakness – where you have to pinpoint a made-up flaw in you character, which actually turns out(!) to be a heavy bonus on our protagonist’s scoreboard (“hmm… I’m a bit of a perfectionist” – see Trainspotting). And so it goes.
This, no less than eternal question does not change with time, civil status or income level (though the answer is heavily affected by all of it), and remains unanswered in the minds of a many: Who am I?
As The Globe and Mail so poignantly puts it: “Perspective is everything”. What and who I am depends … well… on who you are. If you are Canadian, then I’m Russian. If you are Russian, then I’m Jewish. If you happen to be an Israeli, then I am Canadian. If you are French (or French-Canadian for that matter), then I turn out to be an Anglo. Oh, and if you are a cute redhead from last week’s loft-party then I am still an oil billionaire from Alaska. And for the rest of you-z I am all of the above and a bag of chips.
Now. All of this does not mean that I am an empty vessel that eagerly fills up with other peoples’ baloney once activated. Underneath all the layers of faux-sophistication and equally erroneous over-simplification there is a spine and everything that comes along with it.
The obvious question pops to mind: “Which precise characteristic will prevail if and when I shall encounter you?” That, I say, depends on all those variables mentioned above, tricky If-Then sequences (hey programmers!), and average atmospheric conditions in the equatorial part of Papua New Guinea – which is to say: who knows. If you, my friend, are feeling a little bored, or under the weather, or simply got some time to kill, then go ahead, plug in those variables into an equation and see if you can come up with a possible outcome. Otherwise just drop me a line and find out first-hand who is Rublz. Respect.
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